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The $9.6 Trillion Empathy Opportunity
After 20 years of raising two beautiful daughters, training in NVC with Marshall Rosenberg, mediating in Superior Court, volunteering in the Alternatives to Violence Project in our prisons, leading couples circles, building community using Sacred Council Circle, starting two businesses and thriving in 25 years of marriage, it became clear to me that business teams need a reliable, simple way to resolve conflict quickly and painlessly, and create harmonious collaboration without sacrificing clarity, integrity and truth.
That's why I developed Empathy Sequencing—to give you the road map and the power to transform disengagement and conflict avoidance into honest, heartfelt self expression and supportive, respectful and productive relationships in the workplace.
Sometimes 50 minutes is all it takes.
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Click the button below to schedule a complimentary 50 minute Breakthrough Conversation with me.
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testimonials
Catherine Cooley is an exceptional coach and mediator. I am a big fan and refer her to others a lot. She embodies Compassionate or Nonviolent Communication (NVC) by modeling empathy, honesty, self-connection, mutuality and gratitude - wherever she is. She has mediated twice for me - once with my family and then with a friend and colleague for the purpose of relationship repair. Both mediations were productive, effective and led to resolutions and emotional ease. I felt supported and respected with her coaching and her mediation.
I also co-facilitate an NVC practice group with Catherine. I enjoy our collaboration and it has been a joy working with her.
I really appreciate Catherine's focus on slowing things down and inviting folks to be self connected. Her natural compassion creates an atmosphere of trust and connection between everyone present.
My work with Catherine brings me important insights and inspiration to look at things from a totally new angle. Her sessions help me feel more connected to myself and to my husband. We both got reconnected to the deeper good intentions we still have for each other, and are now in a more powerful place of hope and vision for our relationship.
Catherine’s work is action oriented. She has a knack for digging up the real issues and figuring out how to deal with them.
As a gourmet consumer of psychotherapists and coaches, I have worked with some very skilled and well known facilitators and therapists, and Catherine is right in there with them. I never feel that I need to hold back with Catherine - she invites all of it, and has the capacity, understanding and skill to keep the conversation safe and on track. What has perhaps been most surprising is how calm and clear our sessions are, even when we are diving into challenging issues. She is able to create safety and comfort for people who are hesitant to share and open up and never wavers in her level of care for both parties.
Her session notes have been very organized and helpful. The notes reinforce the work we’ve done, and prevent us from having to hash and rehash the past over and over again. In our video call sessions I was surprised at how connected and focused we were. The safety and warmth of the conversation felt as if we were all in the same room.
I recommend Catherine as a resource to my patients when they are having relationship problems. I have learned so much from her program that I will be able to use for the rest of my life. I am grateful that I now have a solid method and strategy for speaking directly with people. Her program has been a priceless investment for me and my family.
Catherine, thank you for giving us options to reframe these words, assumptions and judgments that bring disconnection.
We are in a service industry and an important part of being of service is to stay curious so that we gain the clarity that we need to move past judgment and faux feelings and give amazing service that lets us rise to excellence. We need to stay humble, be kind and be aware that clients do not have our NVC education. So when they are upset, they use tragic strategies to meet their needs. Otherwise, how can we truly be of service? Instead, we can understand their needs and we can stay present and focused on getting their world and give them empathy.
The results are excellence in client care, which is what we are building. I do not believe that we can be on the same path to give excellent care as a team if we do not all embrace this way of thinking and speaking.
Words fall short in describing my gratitude for Catherine Cooley’s coaching and mediation. Catherine’s mediation, compassionate communication and coaching skills have helped me navigate and resolve many difficult situations. I have utilized Catherine’s skills to resolve employee difficulties on five separate occasions leading to: one employee termination, two employee transitions, one waive of labor claim coupled with increase in interpersonal skills necessary for effective capacity in job description and one employee quit and eviction following legal counsel. In the first 4 situations, I was able to preserve the rapport, integrity and care of my relationships which has continued to this day. In the latter, I acquired the strength and clarity to seek legal counsel to preserve the safety and autonomy of my family.
On a personal level, I have sat in sacred circle with Catherine for many years and witnessed her depth of care and mastery. I have also observed Catherine mediate large community camping circles involving teens and parents grappling with painful issues surrounding differentiation, experimentation and substance abuse. I have also utilized Catherine’s coaching for areas in my personal life that needed support in moving forward, such as agreements with my son, personal time management, goal setting and action steps. Catherine’s skills are broad, exceptional and heartfelt. I highly recommend her service.
“I can see the tools I’ve gained with you are now going outwards in so many ways.
For example - some of our customers are very difficult. Our work is time sensitive and things need to be there for important events. We do a good job, but we are not not perfect.
Now, though, I don’t judge the customers anymore. Instead I guess how they are feeling and what they are needing. I envision what this means for them to be well dressed for a church installation, gala, retirement ceremony etc. It is amazing. They can feel that someone is respecting them and caring, and they get calm. It was never like this in the past.
This empathy also compels us to work harder for them. Our customer interactions are now helping us to grow, solve problems, innovate, in a way that is mutual. I hope it is an experience that they never forget.
My team can see I'm in a good space now, calm, not acting out anymore. You can say anything to me and I’ll understand your need or make a guess. Before I would see anxiety and anger rising within me, but now it is not even there.”
Thank you – that was a beautiful, comprehensive summary. You really zeroed in on the points of pain for me. I feel more space, and freedom. Yes, being heard and reflected by you Catherine was like a healing balm – covering my wounded heart. I am tearing up. It feels so good to be heard.
Appreciation and gratitude for new awareness, authenticity and understanding. I am grateful for the safety and structure of the mediation – brilliant, happy to experience you Catherine.
Also: you did a brilliant job facilitating council circles for our non-profit organization. Your presence was calm and peaceful - yet powerful, creating an atmosphere of relaxation and connection that inspired deep and authentic sharing. We would be delighted to have you work with us again in the future.
Wow that was so amazing. I've felt such a lifegasm after talking to you. I feel connected to my power and so inspired and humbled full of forgiveness and connected to my life force in the space you hold for me. This has been such an answer to prayer. I look forward to growing and expanding together. Thank you infinitely.
“I've known Catherine Cooley for years now - we took a consensus class together and that's where I discovered her highly developed abilities as a facilitator. She can really hold the multiple levels of consciousness necessary to create communication and forward motion.
She was head and shoulders above the rest of the class by virtue of her years of diligent study and application of these skills. She's the best facilitator I've ever met, and she comes from a direction of compassion and willingness to pull the weight.
I've since hired her to facilitate a community town hall panel - and she was great! From a business perspective, she can get a group to cover a lot of ground efficiently, and as a coordinated unit. Her combination of organizational skills, blazing intelligence, and positive attitude make her very valuable.
She's a lovely person, and very sharp - but not deadly serious. I love her laughter!”
“Catherine, thank you for giving us options to reframe these words, assumptions and judgments that bring disconnection.
We are in a service industry and an important part of being of service is to stay curious so that we gain the clarity that we need to move past judgment and faux feelings and give amazing service that lets us rise to excellence. We need to stay humble, be kind and be aware that clients do not have our NVC education. So when they are upset, they use tragic strategies to meet their needs. Otherwise, how can we truly be of service? Instead, we can understand their needs and we can stay present and focused on getting their world and give them empathy.
The results are excellence in client care, which is what we are building. I do not believe that we can be on the same path to give excellent care as a team if we do not all embrace this way of thinking and speaking.”Photo: Catherine (middle) leading a workshop for entrepreneurs at Women’s Economic Ventures, Santa Barbara, California
“I am so glad NVC made it happen to transform me from who I was before. Previously, I was a ‘Jackal’, only caring about myself as the center of attention and hardly did I pay attention to the needs of others. I always assumed I knew everything and as a behavioral scientist I only had a 'Me' perspective. However, now even at work, I solely base my decision making on NVC, especially in meeting the needs of our customers. My main sales and marketing techniques are now to connect with the customer through empathy. This is also how I interact with my co-workers.😊 ”
Photo: Sam Odhiambo, Catherine’s co-trainer for NVC training for Dandora community in Nairobi Kenya.
Catherine, I enjoyed how you listened to C and gave insights based on what you heard - a deep level of working with it. I observed a closing off in her. You were gentle. Even though you made a perfectly accurate observation that was refused, even though it didn’t land - you were able to find another way to connect, gently, continuing to let the space be open. I was amazed by that. It was huge for me to witness. You stayed with it so diligently, stayed the course, kept trusting the process calmly. I love listening to you unravel all of us!
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